


AA345

by Kabieee



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anime Conventions, Cosplay, First Kiss, Friends to Lovers, Long-Distance Friendship, M/M, Reunions
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-29
Updated: 2020-03-20
Packaged: 2021-02-28 02:34:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 13,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22962475
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kabieee/pseuds/Kabieee
Summary: TetsusaigaHorizon had been Sylvain’s first friend on the internet he spoke to more than a couple times. His real name was Felix, and he’d always been awake at three a.m. when Sylvain was. They’d spent hours talking about video games, even working on Harvest Moon fanfiction together at one point when Sylvain was in eighth grade and Felix was in sixth.Felix’s brother died during the summer before seventh grade. He’d posted on their LiveJournal a few times after, apologizing to everyone for not being on more.  Eventually he stopped though, and Sylvain had never been able to find him after. To think that now, all these years later in their adult lives they’d possibly cross paths again made Sylvain’s head mushy and light. He felt silly, thinking about being friends with Felix again. Nearly ten years had passed since then; both of them were absolutely different people.He couldn’t deny, though, that it’d be cool to finally meet his childhood friend in person.
Relationships: Annette Fantine Dominic & Felix Hugo Fraldarius, Felix Hugo Fraldarius & Ingrid Brandl Galatea, Felix Hugo Fraldarius/Sylvain Jose Gautier, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Sylvain Jose Gautier & Bernadetta von Varley
Comments: 12
Kudos: 58





	1. Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is self-indulgent AF but I don't care. I'm writing this LOL. To keep me motivated I'm posting the first part! This will be multiple chapters, and it's obviously not going to all happen in a three to four day span at a convention hahaha. I'm very excited for this!! Thank you to Lois for bouncing ideas back and forth with me on this :D

Sylvain shut the door of his hatchback, smiling at his friend as she stood anxiously on the passenger’s side of the car. Bernadetta was an anxious wreck, as was normal for her, but there was also a genuine excitement as she checked her bag for her things.

“Ready to get on the road?”

“Y-yeah… I think I am!”

They didn’t have a long way to go. The convention was a quick twenty-minute drive away, it being the first time in a while Bernie was tabling at one so close to home. Sylvain was sure that was a positive factor in her mood, knowing they didn’t have to commute to another state or spend upwards of five or six hours in Sylvain’s car. It also meant they didn’t have to get a hotel room and she could come home to her kitties at the end of the day.

Sylvain and Bernadetta had always been friends, it seemed. Friends long enough that Sylvain remembered when she first took up drawing and writing in elementary school. She’d been practicing and honing her craft for years, and he was extremely proud of her for the skills she’d acquired. She’d never been good with people, much preferring to spend time alone and filling up sketchbook after sketchbook of material. She’d let him in to her personal bubble only after he’d accidentally found her fairytales on the playground, threatening him with his life if he ever told anyone what he’d read.

Sometimes lifelong friendships hit you in strange ways.

Nowadays, Sylvain helped run her store, handling most of the aspects of business that made her shrivel up on her couch and shake. He hadn’t wanted to work for his father’s company, so the big expensive business degree he’d gotten at the state’s top school was actually put to use. He was able to do his own art on the side: landscapes that got hung up in nearly every high-rise professional building downtown. If he remembered correctly, one of his lake pieces was located in the hotel for the convention they were attending.

“So I think TetsusaigaHorizon is going to be at the con,” Bernadetta mumbled as they got on the highway. Sylvain’s eyes widened and he looked at her incredulously, clenching the steering wheel tighter.

“How do you know? We haven’t heard from him since middle school!”

“He recently found me again on Twitter! And he lives in the metro like we do!” she replied, not showing Sylvain her phone but assumedly going to his page. “When we park, I need to show you his tattoo. He actually got tetsusaiga on his forearm a few years ago...”

If Sylvain thought he’d never hear a name again, it would be that one. Like many nerds their age, Sylvain and Bernadetta’s adolescence had been cultivated online. Blog websites like tumblr. and LiveJournal had shaped their early days of fandom, both of them making numerous online friends along the way. TetsusaigaHorizon had been Sylvain’s first friend on the internet he spoke to more than a couple times. His real name was Felix, and he’d always been awake at three a.m. when Sylvain was. They’d spent hours talking about video games, even working on Harvest Moon fanfiction together at one point when Sylvain was in eighth grade and Felix was in sixth.

Felix’s brother died during the summer before seventh grade. He’d posted on their LiveJournal a few times after, apologizing to everyone for not being on more. Eventually he stopped though, and Sylvain had never been able to find him after. To think that now, all these years later in their adult lives they’d possibly cross paths again made Sylvain’s head mushy and light. He felt silly, thinking about being friends with Felix again. Nearly ten years had passed since then; both of them were absolutely different people.

He couldn’t deny, though, that it’d be cool to finally meet his childhood friend in person.

**

Felix took the room keys from the man at the front desk, slinging his bag up over his shoulder. A quick flurry across the keyboard on his phone let his best friend Annette know that he’d gotten them and was heading up to the room. He made his way through the small crowd of convention goers with only a small grimace, clenching his fist victoriously when he managed to snag an elevator to himself.

Knowing it’d be the last time that weekend it’d happen, he enjoyed the quiet and turned around to look down into the hotel lobby as it went up. His stomach fluttered as it rose and rose, but the excitement for the days ahead made his skin flush. He, Annette, and Ingrid had been going to conventions together for years. They’d started in middle school, making their own Naruto costumes out of clothes found at thrift stores and dyeing their hair the night before the convention. Felix still had a stash of affectionately named ‘cosplay’ towels hidden in the back of his linen closet, towels that were stained with nearly every color of the rainbow.

This year though, after years of going to these events to spend time with his friends, blow his disposable income on merchandise, and drink himself senseless, Annette had finally convinced him to do a small cosplay group again with her and Ingrid. He’d abandoned the practice for years, wanting his money to go towards sword replicas and other hidden treasures to hoard in his room. But when his friends had gotten him into gacha mobile games, Felix had sold his soul enough to get excited when Annette and Ingrid suggested they dress up from one.

Felix looked down at his phone when it buzzed, a message coming in from Twitter making his head swim. There was another reason for his excitement that weekend, a chance of fate that he hadn’t counted on when they made the plans to go to this convention the year prior.

Sometime around Halloween months before, Felix had been scrolling through the tags on social media for his favorite gacha game. It was a daily ritual at that point: looking through tags in an effort to find new merch (either official or fan made; he was so far gone he didn’t care) to throw his money at. A familiar art style had caught his eye, only the style had beautifully grown and improved since he’d seen it as a teenager. After a little bit of research on the artist, he realized it was his online friend from all those years ago. He and Bernie had reconnected quickly, picking back up as though nearly a decade hadn’t passed. He was surprised to see that she was tabling at the convention after she spoke about how bad her anxiety had gotten.

But when Bernadetta attributed her confidence to her friend Sylvain, Felix had nearly screamed. GoddessSpritesHusband, _that_ Sylvain? The same Sylvain he’d had a crush on from the fifth grade until he finally forced himself to move on halfway through tenth? The one he’d ghosted after his brother’s death?

It all nearly seemed too good to be true. Bernadetta told him she and Sylvain had moved to his city after Sylvain got a commission contract. Hearing that he too had excelled in art had made him so happy, thinking back of all those years they spent sending each other Microsoft Paint art and the silly stories they wrote. He had no idea if Sylvain even remembered him, but a heightened sense of anxiety had plagued him ever since she mentioned he’d be helping her at the convention. Felix would be getting to meet two of the best friends he ever made online, even if it was years after the fact.

Felix had no idea if this meeting would result in anything beyond a few nice words and smiles. He figured he’d buy some of Bernadetta’s merch, try his best not to freak out when he finally stood next to Sylvain in real life. It was something he’d always dreamed of, but never thought to be a possibility because of the distance that used to separate them. Now that he knew that in less than 24 hours they’d be in the same building, his heart threatened to beat out of his chest. He had no idea what was in store for him the moment their paths fully crossed.

**

Sylvain returned to his car with his and Bernadetta’s badges, stomach flipping around in his abdomen. One less obstacle between him and the possibility of meeting Felix. The entire registration line had been spent imagining the scenario multiple ways in his head. Did Bernie know what Felix looked like? Would she point him out as he walked up to their table? Were they even planning on meeting up, or had it been long enough since their online friendship ‘ended’ that it was just a happy coincidence they’d all finally be in the same place?

Bernie took her badge gratefully and smiled at her friend. “Thanks, Sylvain. You have no idea how much I appreciate your help…”

“It’s no problem, Bernie,” he grinned, starting the car and leaving the parking deck. He’d been given a map that directed him towards the unloading area for the artist alley, which, to nobody’s surprise, was in the same exact area as the dealer’s area. “Oh shit… this looks like it’ll be messy.”

“Honestly… I just want to get the stuff in and get out,” Bernadetta said fretfully, clutching her purse in her lap. Her eyes were wide at the amount of people already unloading their cars and trailers. “The quicker we do it, the quicker we get to leave.

“Are you sure?” Sylvain asked, eyeing a member of the convention staff who already looked pissed off and stressed out.

“Y-yeah. If you can load the stuff onto the cart… I’ll run ahead and go secure the table…”

“You’re so strong, queen,” Sylvain chuckled, pulling his car up to the curb. He patted his friend’s shoulder encouragingly and smiled confidently at her. “Call me if you need me, okay?”

“Yep! Yep, will do!”

And she was off. Sylvain watched his friend tear out of the car for the door to the convention center, throwing her badge up at the security guard without a word. He was thankful for the distraction; thinking about Felix had made his stomach knot up with excitement and anxiety rolled into a massive ball that felt like it was weighing him down.

He’d been young, but Felix’s friendship had been one of his first hints that he wasn’t into girls. His parents made him go to cotillion as a kid, hoping to groom him to be just like his father. It had always been awkward, and Sylvain had never felt like he’d belonged with the kids in the program. He forced himself through every session, counting down the minutes until he could go home and talk with Felix. They once played around with the idea of exchanging phone numbers and talking on the phone, but Sylvain knew his parents would have taken away his computer time if they knew he was calling strangers from the internet.

In retrospect, Sylvain considered himself lucky that Felix hadn’t actually turned out to be a predatory freak online, something he’d always had in the back of his mind as he got older…

Knowing, at least for now, after all this time, that Felix was _real_ and there was at least a microscopic opportunity they could be friends again made Sylvain’s heart race in his chest.

The more he thought about it too much, the more his anxiety shot through the roof. He focused on loading Bernie’s merch onto the collapsible cart they’d bought, making up a moot checklist in his brain to get his thoughts off of Felix. He had to ground himself in remembering a few things. Like how it’d been nearly ten years since they spoke, how they’d only known each other online all those years ago, and that he has as much luck in the romance department that a praying mantis did.

Sylvain put his hazard lights on and rolled the cart inside the convention center, finding the Artist Alley room with little trouble. He and Bernadetta quickly set up her display, his height coming gratefully in handy for her PVC-pipe skeleton for her prints. She hummed as she looped her fairy lights around the wire cube organizers that displayed her miniature, hand-painted canvases, a calm enveloping her while she put her hands to work. Sylvain smiled softly at her while he taped her prints up along the pipe.

All of her anxiety went away when it came to her art. When she painted or sketched, her eyes softened and her hands stopped shaking. She was able to temporarily let go of all that otherwise hindered her and truly relax.

When her stock was locked up under the table and her pastel rainbow fabric thrown over the top of it, she nodded thankfully at her friend. They went back to Sylvain’s car, where she threw the passenger’s seat back and cinched her hoodie around her face.

“I appreciate you coming with me, Sylvain,” she muttered from below it, patting his arm gratefully as he took her back to their apartment.

“It’s my pleasure, Bee,” he smiled. His chest rose expectantly when he realized he was yet another hurdle closer to meeting Felix. _Goddess_ , he shouldn’t have taken the distraction from that for granted… Bernadetta must have heard his hands clenching around the steering wheel.

“Is something wrong?” she asked nervously, peeking out of her hoodie in worry.

“No! Well not with _you_ , I promise!” he said quickly, looking over at her reassuringly before putting his eyes back on the road. “When you mentioned TetsusaigaHorizon earlier… uh—Felix, I mean—” Sylvain blushed as he tripped over his words. “A… lot of memories came flooding back.” He laughed nervously and rubbed the back of his neck.

Bernadetta removed her hood and sat back up, smiling at her friend.

“He um… mentioned you! A lot, actually…”

“ _What_ —"

“Oh, please don’t be mad!”

“I’m not, I’m not! But what did he say about me?”

Bernie pulled her knees up to her chest and smiled, resting her chin on her knees.

“He said he wanted to talk to us again. When he found me on Twitter he was _so_ excited, Sylvain! He found me through my GranBlue art….”

Bernadetta continued on to tell Sylvain about how their friendship had rekindled before he’d had even been brought up. He couldn’t believe how fate had brought them back together. It couldn’t be anything else; Sylvain was _convinced_.

He hadn’t fully understood Felix’s behavior when everything with his brother had happened. Sylvain knew he’d always _needed_ someone to talk to when things were going wrong, as they often had in his adolescence. His online friends had been one of his biggest sources of strength while he figured himself out in his early high school days, and when Felix cut himself out of the picture it had _stung_.

But when his own brother was ostracized from the family not long after graduating, he began to slowly understand. Seeing his parents vehemently pretend they only had one son, one perfect son, began to take a toll on him in every aspect of his life. If he even mentioned Miklan’s name they would deny knowing any such person, which made Sylvain’s heart twist and mold into something he didn’t recognize. He attempted to change who he was as a person, trying desperately to fit into the rigid mold they’d presented for him. It was all he could do not to express any interests of his own in front of them, fear of their scathing disapproval both frightening and constantly looming over him.

It was their radical changes that had prompted him to move as soon as he was done with college. Bernadetta had more than willingly come with him, eager to get away from her parents as well. Luck just happened to have it that they moved to the same city where Felix had always been.

“He said he wanted to get together this weekend,” Bernie continued, pulling out her phone and going back to her messages. “He and his friends are actually cosplaying! Isn’t that cool?!”

Bernadetta went on about Felix, making Sylvain nearly float off of his seat. He gripped the steering wheel tightly the entire way home, absorbing everything she said about their long-lost friend. He could barely imagine what they’d say to each other. Despite him being the one with words, he could see himself leaning on Bernie for support when it came time to talk to Felix again.

When he got home he settled down in front of his laptop, fingers shaking slightly over the keys. Sylvain miraculously dug up his old LiveJournal password and found his and Felix’s old work, eyes threatening to swim in the tears from his memories.


	2. Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Felix and Sylvain meet for the first time, but they have no idea at first.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These are going to be short because I want them to be! But 3k words also took me two-three days so... LMAO.

Felix woke up on Friday morning jittery and anxious. No amount of alcohol on Thursday night had helped ease his anxiety. He had flashbacks to the evening prior, drinking in the hotel bar with Annette and Ingrid but palming back Jaeger like his life depended on it. His stomach now was threatening to rage a war against him. Had he cried at one point? Felix could have sworn if he looked at the shirt Annette had been wearing that his tear stains might still be on the front. He _knows_ Ingrid exasperatedly tried to tell him everything would be fine, but the intoxicated Felix Hugo of Thursday night could not be convinced.

He threw the covers off himself and hurried into the bathroom, grabbing his water bottle off the TV stand and clutching it achingly. Felix’s thirteen Twitter followers were just going to have to live with his stress Tweets that morning as he fought the nausea that came after drinking an entire bottle of Jaeger. He fired off a few Tweets about Sylvain, wondering to himself what he was going to be like after all these years. Bernie had mentioned that he was now a sought-after artist that painted for private commissioners throughout the city. Felix doubted he’d still crack stupid jokes or freak out with him over video game news or any of his other stupid interests. He liked to believe he’d matured in his twenties, but the fact of the matter was he still got excited when new characters were released in his favorite fighting games. Finding a good deal on merch from Japan was sometimes the one thing that drove his desire to get out of bed in the morning, particularly on those ‘my life feels terrible; will it ever get better?’ days.

Felix almost pointedly ignored the facts. Little things Bernadetta had mentioned about Sylvain after they reunited after all those years of not being in contact with one another. Sylvain was her store’s manager, a manager AND friend who often suggested new merchandise designs while recommending new series for her to look into. But he also let Bernie pamper him, particularly on the days when she found it hard to show herself love. They’d stay awake until four in the morning bingeing old shows they’d seen a million times if one of them needed it. Bernadetta told Felix with utmost seriousness that Sylvain would let her mess with his hair, even give him manicures.

Felix imagined seeing him later that day. He’d most likely be sat at Bernie’s artist alley table, smiling at customers and keeping tallies of what they’d sold. Did Felix want to skip the photoshoot he’d planned on going to to get into the alley first thing? Did that seem too desperate?

He dropped his phone on the ground as he vomited into the toilet, thankful for the quick distraction despite the burning in his stomach and throat. It was a quick bout of sickness, but he pulled himself up to the sink and closed his eyes as he brushed his teeth.

He wanted to kick himself. Nobody had ever made him feel this way before. Ever since Glenn died, he’d kept a very small, very tightknit group of friends, never venturing out unless both Ingrid and Annette forced him. Felix had found that hooking up at conventions a few times a year was the most of his ‘social’ life, and he’d purposefully ghost the guys afterward. He knew he was an asshole for using them, but these trysts sated desires he couldn’t ignore without all the emotional baggage and effort of a relationship.

Why was Sylvain so different? Felix didn’t think a crush from sixth grade, a silly, insignificant crush that he’d long gotten over would fester on the rare occurrence that Sylvain would be back in his life. And he wasn’t even _back_ , if Felix was being real with himself. Glenn had rubbed off on him that preparing for the worst was a good way of looking at things. When (rarely if) things turned out badly, it wouldn’t sting as much.

Then he died… something Felix would have never in a million years had been able to prepare for.

Felix looked at himself in the bright, intense lighting of the hotel bathroom and slowly pulled his toothbrush out of his mouth, spitting in the sink before hastily wiping the tears away that had begun to roll down his cheeks. He chalked up Sylvain’s sudden arrival back in his life as a sign. He hated himself for his anxiety and high hopes about their reunion, but certainly this was happening for a _reason_. And a good reason, Felix hoped.

He stubbornly finished his morning routine, fighting the emotions bubbling up inside of him as he straightened up the counter while he swished mouthwash around. If anything, he was going to use this meeting with his childhood friend as an opportunity to really apologize. To attempt to atone for completely cutting him off, for giving him no way of contacting him again. Maybe it was too late, but Felix wouldn’t know until he tried.

**

Sylvain parked his car at the convention center’s parking deck, realizing his left leg had been anxiously bouncing the entire drive there from their apartment. Bernadetta didn’t look reassured by their mutual anxiety, so he gave her a squeeze on her knee and smiled.

“It’s going to be a great day, Bernie!” he said, taking his badge off of the rearview mirror and draping it around his neck.

“Then why do you look paler than _I_ do?!” she muttered, pulling hers out of her purse and adorning it.

“It’s—” Sylvain had articulated to Bernadetta just how worked up this whole Felix news had made him, but he was certain she didn’t fully understand the severity. They hadn’t talked about Felix for a long time after he disappeared back then, both too upset by his absence in their online groups. Eventually they both moved on in their own ways. “It’s… Felix.”

“What about him?” She asked concernedly, turning in the passenger’s seat to face him.

Sylvain dejectedly fell back against his own, rubbing his eyes and sighing. “I haven’t spoken to him in ten years. Ten years! But the thought of seeing him, of _meeting_ after all this time… it has my stomach in knots.”

Bernie was quiet, but reached her hand over and put it on his.

“We were so young,” he laughed dryly, looking at her thankfully. “But losing him was almost as hard as losing… Miklan.”

Bernadetta’s other hand clasped over her mouth and her brows furrowed with emotion.

“I want to be his friend again! I want us to hang out! But we’re different people than the ones we were as kids! God, I feel so stupid…”

“Sylvain, please don’t feel stupid!” Bernie said. “I felt the same way when he messaged me the first time. It took so long for me to reply at all. I thought he’d give up because it took so long…” she winced and crossed her legs in the seat. “I’ll _show you_ the messages if that makes you feel better—”

“No, Bee, you don’t need to show me your private conversations,” Sylvain replied with a smile. “Knowing he wants to meet up too makes me feel a lot better. But… you know,” he snorted, motioning to himself with a roll of his eyes.

“Just do what you tell me, Sylvain!” she replied excitedly, looking at him with determination and clutching his hands. “Breathe! Don’t be afraid to say what’s on your mind!”

“If I say what’s on my mind, he’ll know I have an outdated, baseless crush on him!”

“Okay, maybe don’t say _everything_ on your mind, Sylvain!”

The best friends chuckled before breaking out into laughter, soon wiping tears from their eyes.

“I’ll try to help as much as I can, Sylvain,” she said confidently, a light in her eyes telling him that she meant it. “I want Felix back too!”

They gathered their things and headed inside. Sylvain knew he’d have to give himself pep talks right up until the moment he heard Bernie say ‘there he is’.

**

Felix held Annette and Ingrid’s bags as they checked their wigs and makeup in the mirror by the elevators. This was a normal ritual. They’d spend the least amount of time possible in the room in front of one, instead running around searching for their badge or the wig brush. These things had a nasty habit of growing legs and running amok in their hotel room every year. But Felix, used to their antics by now, had placed their badges in his bag and had purchased an extra brush for this convention season. Being friends with the two women for nearly his entire life had taught him a few things about preparedness.

When they were satisfied with how they looked, Annette pulled out her phone and pulled Felix over to her side and stood between him and Ingrid.

“Smile!”

She snapped a selfie and grinned happily, throwing her arms up over their shoulders in a group hug.

“We look amazing, you guys…!”

Felix couldn’t deny his pride at how their costumes had turned out. Their Friday group was simple this year, but thanks to Annette’s research online she’d perfected makeup on Ingrid to make her look like a completely different person. With the revival of their favorite series as kids, they’d decided to bring the three main characters of Fruits Basket to life. Annette was Tohru, of course, Ingrid was Kyo, and Felix had taken the much-appreciated opportunity to be a quiet character in the group as Yuki.

“What time does the artist alley open?” Felix’s attempt at a _totally_ nonchalant question made Ingrid’s head whip around to look at him as they stepped into the elevator.

“Is that where Sylvain’s going to be?” she asked, squeezing her way to the back. Felix’s eyes locked on to her defiantly as he forced a shrug.

“No clue. There’s an artist I’m wanting to meet and buy from before their stock gets obliterated.”

“I’m so happy you’re getting to meet him and Bernadetta!” Annette smiled excitedly, bouncing on the balls of her feet. “It’s going to be _fine_ , Felix, don’t worry!”

“You. Say that.” He muttered in reply, arm instinctively going around his stomach as he remembered his morning spent by the toilet in the bathroom.

“Don’t drink an entire bottle of Jaeger tonight and it’ll be fine,” Ingrid piped up, smirking. “The alley opens at noon, by the way.” She pointed to the times listed in the program book.

 _Jesus, it’s later and later every year…_ he thought to himself, frowning and feeling his shoulders fall. There was the possibility of messaging Bernie and asking her what they’d be doing before they had to get to her table, but the thought of doing that made his stomach do somersaults. As luck would have it, though, his Twitter notifications could be heard from his pocket.

_Morning Felix! We’re at the con a little early (why does the AA not open until noon?!) Sylvain and I were going to grab some breakfast if u wanted to join us! We’re sitting down in the food court of the galleria~~ we have a table near the subway and Chinese place!_

Felix’s face instantly went red with a flurry of anxiety, hope, and dread. Annette looked at him curiously, raising an eyebrow as her best friend shoved his phone in her face without saying anything.

“Felix! You should go! You’d get to talk to him without the pressure of standing in front of Bernadetta’s table…!”

Felix knew she was right, but the issue stood that she was _right_. What if the close interaction was all Sylvain needed to determine he hated him? There was the plus side of getting it out of the way early on if so, then he’d be free to find the poor fool who he’d hook up with for the weekend without the hope and desire for his old friend weighing down on him.

“We’ll come with you if that helps,” Ingrid said reassuringly, putting her hand on her friend’s shoulder. Felix looked at both of them, his two best friends in the world. Two of the only people he still talked to after his brother died, the two who had done everything in their power to make him smile after it had happened. They’d sat with him through fits of crying and anger, held him when he’d fought the desire to harm himself mentally or physically. Felix felt as though he didn’t deserve them and their love and companionship, but considered himself the luckiest person in the world for them.

He typed up a quick confirmation and took a shaky breath, pocketing his phone while Ingrid and Annette cheered for him. There was a sense of exhilarating doom as they stepped off the elevator, knowing their footsteps were only bringing them closer to the food court. While he was running circles in his mind trying to think of how he’d greet them, he felt Annette tap his shoulder.

“They want our picture, Felix!” she whispered, pointing at a group of young girls nearby. Their parents stood behind them with wild looks on their faces, taking in the sights of what Felix assumed was their first ever convention. He smiled, thankful for the distraction. They guided the girls and their parents over to a less crowded area by the elevators and set their things down, standing in front of a beautiful chest high wall adorned with real foliage.

The three posed for a simple group shot, the girls thanking them after they snapped the pictures. Their parents shot them bewildered but soft looks, following their kids as they ran off towards more cosplayers. They’d opened the flood gates though, and more people had noticed their group when they’d stopped. The attention was welcomed and appreciated, of course, but the longer they stood there the more Felix’s stomach flurried. When some convention goers were shooting selfies with Ingrid and Annette, he shot a quick message to Bernadetta that they’d been stopped for pictures and were still on the way.

“Excuse me, you look amazing. Can I get your picture? I want a group shot too, but Yuki was always my favorite…”

Felix looked up and nearly had to bite his lip. An extremely attractive, tall, broad-shouldered redhead stood before him, clutching his phone with a shy smile on his face.

“Y-yeah, of course,” Felix replied with a small smile, sliding his phone in his back pocket. He stepped back against the marble wall that had the plants inside it and slid into his soft Yuki smile. The guy’s face erupted in a grin that threatened to split it in half, flushing over his in-character pose.

“Thank you so, _so_ much! You make such a good Yuki… Your friends look awesome too,” he smiled, stepping forward to get out of someone’s way. Felix could feel a blush creeping on to his face. This guy was _attractive_ … part of him wanted to get his number in case things didn’t work out with Sylvain…

When his stomach guiltily dropped in his stomach at that thought, he mentally shook it away and turned to his best friends. “Hey guys, we got another.” They fell into their normal group pose with Annette in the center. While the guy was taking their picture, Felix noticed that his bag had a keychain of the character he was cosplaying the next day. When he was finished snapping his pictures, he nearly bounced over to him and pointed it out.

“We’re cosplaying the Eternals tomorrow,” he said after the guy thanked Annette and Ingrid for the picture.

“Oh my _god_ , no way!” he replied, glancing down at the Quatre charm with his mouth open. “Oh man… I can’t wait to see that!” His phone started buzzing in his hand. “Oh shit, I need to get back to my friend, she’s probably pretty anxious by herself… Do you have Twitter or Insta? I’d love to hang out with you guys if you’re free!”

“Annette—” Felix had whipped around to his best friend to ask for one of their social media cards, but she already had one in her hand. He handed it to the guy, flushing when his entire hand was used to take it. His hands were soft…

“Thanks! Oh gosh, I hope I see you guys around again today! I’m going to be in the artist alley for most of it. You guys all look awesome, thanks again!”

Felix’s brain didn’t register his last sentences as he smiled at them and hurried away, answering the call coming in on his phone. There was still guilt in his mind for wanting to hook up with him, but when he remembered Glenn’s advice it eased up a bit. He told himself it was the best-case scenario he could aim for when things with Sylvain would naturally blow away like dust, as they were sure to do.

After another round of pictures by convention goers, Felix, Annette, and Ingrid grabbed their things and walked with determination towards the food court. They used speed and dead-pan looks to deter people stopping them, which at the moment was much less important than their destination. They walked through the hotel lobby to the breezeway that would lead them to the Galleria, which was the next door building that the convention shared space with. From there it was a short walk over to the escalators for the food court. But in that short span of space Felix began to sweat.

“I don’t know if I can do this.”

“Felix, we’re literally here… I’m certain we’re looking at them in some capacity…” Ingrid laughed and put a strong hand on his shoulder. “You can do this. You need to do this!”

“She said their table was by Subway and China Sun,” he muttered quietly, pulling out his phone and looking at Bernadetta’s message again. He knew what she looked like, but had zero idea what Sylvain had grown up to be. He scanned the area for a head of purple hair, stomach squirming horribly in his abdomen. He nearly choked when he spotted her, as she had a companion with her at the table.

“Bernie?”

“Felix?!”

“ _Felix_?!”

Felix stared at them, his long-lost internet friend from childhood and the redhead who’d taken their pictures in the hotel lobby.

“Felix, oh my gosh, hi!” She stood up and clenched her fists up under her chin. “I can’t believe this is happening!” She turned to the redhead and smiled excitedly. “Sylvain, this is Felix!”

Felix’s heart was pressed into his throat as he looked at Sylvain. This was going to be one hell of a fucking weekend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on twitter, @setethstiddies!


	3. Part 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I’ve dreamt of this before,” he started, finally focusing his eyes on his friend. “Years after I… stopped talking to you.” He ran his thumb over Sylvain’s cheek, feeling breathless just at the sight of his eyes gazing up into him alone. His red brows were furrowed, the smallest pout on his lips as he listened to him. “It doesn’t make sense for me to feel the way I feel.”
> 
> “It doesn’t have to,” Sylvain said with a soft wink.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait on this one!! It's Friday of the con, what will Sylvix do?
> 
> Huge thank you to Lois for being my cheerleader through this!!! ILY and your brain <3
> 
> Please enjoy! It's fun pretending I'm at a con since they're all getting canceled LMAO :,)

Sylvain shot up from his chair, hurrying around the table to stand near Bernadetta. His eyes couldn’t leave him, couldn’t leave _Felix_ , the man he’d been spending the last twenty-four hours thinking about. He couldn’t believe how their paths had already crossed without their knowing, as if the universe wanted to only add on to their reunion. 

“Bernie, I actually ran into them not five minutes ago in the lobby, I can’t… can’t believe this,” he smiled, motioning to Felix and his friends. He hadn’t gotten their names, he realized, but if he was being honest they were the last things on his mind at the present. His friend from so long ago, a friend he would have given _anything_ to meet in person back then, was standing before him. Felix was real, he was breathing, he wasn’t a sick freak catfishing him. Sylvain knew those were pretty low standards, but it came after trying to convince himself not to get too excited about their meeting.

“Bernadetta, Sylvain, I’m—happy we’re finally meeting,” Felix said quietly with a smile, gripping his phone tightly in his hands. “Can one of you guys—”

“Gimme your phone, of course! This is so cool!” Annette said with a nearly hidden wink at Felix, shoving him to Sylvain’s side and motioning sweetly for Bernadetta to go on his other. “Felix told us all about you as kids, you know! Smile, you guys!”

Sylvain could feel his skin burning with excitement when Felix’s arm went around his waist.

“Oh god, I didn’t even ask; I’m so sorry—”

“No, it’s cool! No worries,” Sylvain said quickly, draping his arm as casually around Felix’s shoulders as he could muster. He barely realized he was squeezing it as they all smiled for the picture Annette was taking. Bernadetta bounced happily on her feet after Felix’s friend had gotten a few.

“You guys… this is so exciting!” she said, voice shaking. Sylvain was unsure if it was nerves or happiness or both, but it made his smile even wider. “I never thought the day would come.”

“Come on, guys, sit down and eat with us! We still have a little bit before we can go in the artist alley if you guys aren’t busy,” Sylvain said, motioning to their mostly empty table. He thought he might be imagining it, but Felix’s two friends purposefully sat so that their chairs would be next to one another.

“Sylvain, Bernie, this is Ingrid and Annette. We’ve been friends… since forever,” Felix said, nodding at them respectively as he introduced them.

“Annette, you’re the one that sings, r-right?” Bernadetta asked her, clutching her hands under her chin as she smiled nervously at her.

“Oh my gosh… yes I am! I don’t sing much anymore… but I work on our cosplay group’s Instagram a lot!”

“You guys have a cosplay group?” Sylvain asked, looking solely at Felix as he did so.

“…Yes. Check out that card I gave you,” he said with a roll of his eyes, cheeks warming as he opened up the app on his phone.

Sylvain took out the card Felix had given him, not having a chance to look at it closely as he’d been on the phone with Bernie after parting from them. He couldn’t help but chuckle at their name, snorting into the crook of his arm.

“Bad… Dad Club?”

“B!”

“D!”

“C…”

“Don’t forget the star!”

“It was a joke at first,” Felix mumbled, looking down at the card in Sylvain’s hand. “We were all pretty angsty teenagers. All convinced we hated our fathers. So when we… decided we were a cosplay group and not just three idiots playing dress up at conventions, which we still were, by the way, we decided to call ourselves the…” Felix sighed and shook his head. “The Bad Dad Club.”

“I love it!” Bernadetta laughed, her glee a little too real for Sylvain. He patted her hand comfortingly and slid the card into his wallet.

“I do too. I can’t wait to follow you guys!”

“You won’t see any pictures of Felix,” Ingrid said with a scoff. Felix shot her a look and narrowed his eyes.

“I don’t mind if pictures of me in _costume_ go up. But you two always try to take them of me when I’m working on our props. Or you catch me mid-movement when we’re out just as friends. Instagram people don’t need to perceive me… ever.”

Sylvain laughed loudly at Felix’s bashfulness, finding himself seriously having to fight the urge to touch his arm as he listened to their conversation. An odd sensation was building up in him, almost as if his brain was aware of his presence beside him but wanted to make him act like an idiot because of it. But he had to remind himself not to move to quickly, not to do anything Felix might think was weird or make him uncomfortable.

“What do you want to eat, Felix? We’ll go get food while you all talk,” Annette spoke up, standing up with her wallet in her hand.

“Whatever you get is fine.”

They walked away, leaving him alone with Sylvain and Bernadetta. “You guys… I’m seriously very happy. This is all so much and I feel lightheaded, if I’m being honest.”

“Us too, Felix,” Bernie said with a soft smile. “When you messaged me, it felt like a dream come true! And when I told Sylvain about it, well… we were both in shock. We know… it must have been extremely difficult for you back then.”

“God, you guys—I’m so… _sorry_. I shouldn’t have just. Stopped talking to you both. You two were always such good friends to me. I was selfish, and stupid. I don’t think my apology should mean anything to you.”

“Fe, it’s okay.” Sylvain turned in his chair and also reached out his hand. Reaching out towards his old friend, someone he’d forced himself to not think about for years. Not until things went south with his own brother anyway. And even then, he had to remind himself that Felix was gone, that he nor Bernadetta had any way to contact him. He’d accepted it, no matter how painful it had been all those years ago. “That’s all behind us. We have a real opportunity to be friends again. And we’ve all grown up a little since then… I know we’re certainly not upset with you still. As much as it sucked, you had a reason for what you did!”

“That doesn’t make it a good one, though…” Felix said in frustration, slouching down in his chair. “But… I am grateful. This means a lot to me.”

“Now it’s even better because we live here now! The universe definitely wanted us to be friends again,” Bernadetta said happily, bouncing in her seat. “As did we.”

The reunited friends joined hands quickly, chuckling at the silly display. But it was comforting to them: something as simple as sitting together in real life at a table felt like an extremely special moment that had been nearly twelve years in the making. Sylvain looked at Bernadetta first, his oldest and best friend in the world, then at Felix beside him. He could certainly see their friendship rekindling without much struggle, but the nonsensical crush he’d rediscovered only blossomed inside him the more he looked at him.

It was hopefully the first weekend of many that they’d spend together, but Sylvain’s mind was on a constant loop of ‘ _Don’t fuck this up, don’t fuck this up, don’t fuck this up…. Do. Not. Fuck. This. Up._ ’

**

Felix, Ingrid, and Annette walked with Sylvain and Bernadetta to the doors of the artist alley after they finished eating their breakfast. He felt as though he’d done a good job of talking to everyone equally, but Felix realized that his body had been directly turned towards Sylvain for most of it.

Sylvain had grown up to be everything he was not as a teenager. He was charming, charismatic, and alluring. Felix could barely keep his eyes off of him as he spoke, hanging on to nearly everything that came out of his mouth. Even when he spoke briefly about what had happened with his brother in high school, there was a captivating presence about him. When he talked about what he did for a living, Felix imagined him in a grand, sunny studio, pouring hours and hours into a canvas. He found himself desperately wanting to go around town to see them, mentioning it out loud to the others.

“That might actually be really fun!” Bernadetta suggested, smiling at Felix from across the table. “Sylvain, you should take him!”

Before Sylvain could stop himself, he’d pulled something directly out of his ass and said, “it’s a date!” Felix hadn’t protested, only smiled at him with a quick nod.

Now they stood by the doors that lead into the artist alley, slightly apart from the girls as they chatted happily about the Granblue costumes they’d be wearing the next day. Felix knew they were distancing themselves on purpose, but the butterflies still erupted in his stomach when Sylvain smiled. Every smile so far that morning had threatened Felix’s composure. He could sit and look at that smile forever.

“Well. We’ll be here all day,” Sylvain laughed, leaning back up against the wall behind him. Felix shifted on his feet and nodded, glancing over at Bernadetta. She seemed to be handling Ingrid and Annette okay, but knew she’d get more nervous once the alley was open and people were walking by her table.

“If you guys need anything at all, just text me. I’ll bring you coffee, food, whatever you need,” he replied. “I hope her sales are good.”

“Thanks, Felix. Don’t go out of your way for us. We’re hoping so,” Sylvain grinned, looking at his best friend lovingly. “She put a lot of effort into her merch for this season so I’m hoping it does well. She usually sells out at this con but you never know…”

“Are you ready, Sylvain?” she called, gripping the straps of her backpack anxiously. He nodded and turned back to Felix, who was rooted in place. Sylvain stood a bit taller than he did, and he’d be a liar if that didn’t make his pants a little tighter.

“Well, Felix, this morning was amazing,” Sylvain laughed lightly, reaching out to touch his friend’s shoulder. He stopped himself though, trying to rein in his overly familiar attitude. He was hyperaware of it and it ate at him like nothing else. “We usually take a break for lunch around one or two if you guys aren’t busy. I’d love to hang out again.”

“Absolutely,” Felix said, expertly keeping the flushing of his face to a minimum. “We’ll come by and see you guys in a little bit.” They walked closer to Bernadetta and the others. “Bernie, best of luck out there. You can do it, I know you can.”

“Thanks, Felix! I… I hope so,” she smiled. They waved to Felix, Annette, and Ingrid and showed their badges to the staffer. When they were out of earshot, Felix took a deep breath and put his fingers on his temples.

“Does he think I’m an idiot. Did it seem like he wanted to get away as soon as possible?”

“Felix, shut up,” Ingrid laughed, readjusting her bag before they started walking. “He couldn’t keep his eyes off you, and you know it.”

“I kept staring too. He probably felt obligated so it wasn’t _weird_.”

“No, Felix, she’s right! It was all in his body language too. You two were hanging on to each other’s words like your lives depended on it. Even Bernie noticed, and she said something to us about it because she knew you two weren’t paying attention!”

“Oh _Jesus_ , I’m such an asshole--”

“Feliiiiiiiix,” Annette sighed, stopping at looking at him with her eyebrow cocked up. “Worry about you! If you want to spend more time with Sylvain, do it! You might be happier doing that than what you _normally_ do at conventions,” she said with a gentle smile, tilting her head to the side slightly. He huffed, but knew she was right.

“I agree,” Ingrid chimed in, her face softening from it’s usual look of lowkey irritation with the general populace. “It was… extremely clear to all of us that you two are into each other. And that’s _okay_. If you need to blow us off so you can go blow or get blown—”

“ _Ingrid_!!”

“I want Felix to live his best life. If we need to clear out of the room, just let us know. If you want to adopt some newfound restraint and take things slow and just want to go in there and relax, that’s cool too.”

Felix laughed and shook his head, regarding his two best friends with a smile on his face. “I seriously doubt that will happen this weekend.”

They kept walking, Felix setting out on one of his usual, par for the course explanations of everything that could (and would absolutely) go wrong because of who he was as a person. Sylvain would realize quickly that Felix nearly purposefully sabotages any relationships he might form so he can’t get hurt. He’ll see that Felix purposefully goes out of his way to be careless about sexual encounters three or four times a year to fulfil the rare desire for intimacy but then immediately ghost the person to avoid emotions and feelings. All of this and more, piled on to the fact that he’s a goddamn nerd who plays dress-up with his friends and has no friends beside them.

Ingrid opened her mouth to yell at Felix, but they were stopped for a photo before she could say anything. Felix was thankful for the distraction, knowing full well Ingrid would launch into a lecture about his actions and behavior being the number one reason for any unpleasantries he encountered. She was right, and she knew that he knew better, but Felix was pretty stubborn when it came to doing whatever he felt like at the time, regardless of potential negative consequences.

**

Sylvain and Bernadetta uncovered her table and began setting out the higher value items in their displays. He carefully put her original miniature canvases behind an acrylic screen, placing her premade cards about prices on carefully with sticky tack. To prevent theft, they’d tied everything down to her cork boards and wire racks with zip ties, so the screen was yet another barrier against sticky fingers.

“If anyone tries something this weekend, I’m fighting. All out, taking off my earrings and handing them to you.”

“Okay, but don’t yell at me when I inevitably throw them while I run away screaming!!”

Theft had been a problem at the convention they went to previously, the last one they tabled at in their old city. They’d heard about thieves pilfering small items like charms from tables early on in the weekend, so both Sylvain and Bernadetta had kept a close eye on her merch as best as they could. It ended up being for nothing though when someone had picked the lock to the artist alley Saturday night, wiping out nearly half of her stock before moving on to neighboring tables.

It had devastated them both, but it had nearly halted Bernadetta’s willingness to come back to another event to sell her work.

“Now, the final touch…” Bernadetta quickly doodled an angry, microscopic version of herself and Sylvain on a sticky note and placed it on the bottom of the prints that hung right over where they’d be sitting.

_Ahegao sweatshirts/t-shirts +50%_

“Damn right, Bernie. We went too easy on them at the last one with only twenty-five percent!”

The artist alley opened soon after they were done setting up. Sylvain was ready for the rush having seen the line that had formed outside on their way in. Bernadetta quickly turned on her iPad and started doodling, mentally and physically steeling herself for the onslaught of people who would soon be asking them questions and making purchases. They had scored a decent table placement for their first time at this convention, and were seated in the middle of the very first row.

The first hour felt like it happened within the span of a few minutes. Bernadetta was bouncing quietly on her chair, unable to keep the wide smile off her lips when she lightly touched her cash bag. It was a welcome sight when the Wi-fi wasn’t cooperating with them, but her pride and excitement were shining through each time she handed a customer the merch they wanted. Sylvain would quickly and efficiently pull it from their stock behind the table, slipping it into her cute treat bags to the delight of her patrons.

“You’re killing it, Bee,” he said happily, scrolling through her online account to make sure the payments had gone through. She already had a pretty sizeable chunk of money in there, and he couldn’t have been prouder for how well she was handling how nervous she was on the inside.

“I think it’s because most of them haven’t stopped to chat,” she laughed quietly, looking down at her tablet and taking out her pen. Sylvain chuckled and smiled at the people who approached their table.

“Let me know if you have any questions!”

His phone buzzed on the table in front of him. Felix had texted him, making his stomach jump.

_I just saw a yaoi paddle. Is it 2011?_

Sylvain snorted painfully and typed back a reply.

_What if they’re just trying to find an uke, fe? Who are u to deny them that?_

He almost instantly received a response of three skull emojis.

Felix was Sylvain’s window into the outside world of the convention, sending him photos of good cosplays, telling him about the wild things he saw people doing during the early hours. This year’s Friday seemed to stand out from shows in the past: the cops were called on someone for starting a fight in the registration line, starting things off very tensely and strangely.

It was a good day for Bernie, though. She quickly sold out of two of her prints, so Sylvain made a little sign to entice people to return the next day promising a restock. He texted Felix around seven when the alley was set to close.

_Need to take Bernie to restock some prints, but I was gonna come back if you wanted to hang out! Just let me know_

They secured the merch under the table again, double checking the extra locks they’d gotten for the case. Sylvain covered the table, gratefully stretching his legs for the first time since lunch when they’d met up with Felix and his friends again in the food court.

_We are hosting a panel at 830, but it’s only an hour long._

_you’re hosing a panel??? on what!!!_

_Prop making. It was their idea…_

_holy shit. i need to come back for this. what room?_

Sylvain drove a little faster than he was proud of to the FedEx near his and Bernadetta’s apartment. They were only able to get their order rushed because she knew the only employee working. The bribe of two free prints was also a large factor, they knew, but in no time she was all set for the busiest day of the convention.

“So… would you mind if I dropped you off at home? I was going to go back and try to hang out with… Felix,” he flushed, drumming his fingers anxiously on the steering wheel. Bernadetta gasped but nodded happily, clenching her hands under her chin.

“No! Not at all! You know I don’t… want to be there longer than I absolutely have to,” she said in quiet exasperation, looking physically weakened by the time spent at the convention that day. Her cheeks were paler than they had been that morning, and Sylvain could tell she was going to go home and soak in the bath for about two hours to begin to relax. “I’m glad you guys have the opportunity to spend some more time together, though.”

“Me too. I just don’t want to fuck up and say something pulled out of my ass.”

“Well… I don’t know how much help I can be there…”

Sylvain snorted as he flashed his keycard over the reader at their gate. “I happened to look him up a bit at the table earlier. Found his online presence. Saw some things about his brother…”

“Okay, maybe don’t talk about how you stalked him.”

“It’s not stalking if it’s not malicious, right?”

“Pretty sure that’s still stalking!”

Sylvain nodded in admission with a bashful smile and parked in front of their building. “Kinda makes sense why his brother’s death hit him so hard though, you know, more than just the fact that it was his brother, and why he sort of disappeared after a while.”

“Oh—what happened?”

“Felix lost his mom, too. She died when he was five years old. She owned her own dance studio and was a _beautiful_ ballerina. Her name was Amelia…” Sylvain crossed his arms with a small pout on his face. “And apparently Felix’s older brother Glenn loved to dance too. So when she passed away-- and Bernie, Jesus _Christ_ , she died from cancer—Felix took up dancing with Glenn so he wouldn’t be alone. They went to her studio every single day. Even for just a little while. But then—”

Sylvain realized he was crying now, cheeks damp with silent tears that had started to fall while he recounted the things he’d learnt about his childhood friend from obituaries on the internet.

“But then… they lost Glenn, too. He was driving home from work one night and he—” Bernadetta’s hand covered her mouth in quiet horror. Her other went to Sylvain’s hand instinctively. “He was killed by a drunk driver. He was. Literally a week away from graduating high school. He had a full ride on a performing art’s scholarship.”

He swatted the tears out of his eyes and sat back against the seat. “And he was Felix’s _hero_. Felix still dances; he’s a choreographer for the lady who owns his mother’s old studio now. But… losing _both_ of them, I just— I can’t even _imagine_. His pain. How he felt. How lonely he was. I just wish I could have been there for him.”

“Well, you can’t change what’s in the past, Syl… but you can be here now! We have all the time in the world to heal.”

“I hope so.”

**

Felix anxiously eyeballed the crowd that had been seated for their panel. He didn’t see Sylvain yet, something he was unsure if he was happy or sad about. On one hand, he wouldn’t have to worry about yet another set of eyes on him, despite them being the eyes he wanted to see _more_ of. Felix already wanted to shoot himself for letting Annette and Ingrid talk him into joining them for the demonstration. He was the B✰DC’s crafter, having made everyone’s props for as long as they’d been cosplaying. For their panel that evening he’d be doing a simple resin tutorial and going through the steps of making 3D print files. He’d only agreed on the condition he not have to speak.

He could see some of their friends spread out in the medium-sized room they’d been given for their panel. Marianne and Hilda sat near the middle, their Lolita coordinates sticking out beautifully in the crowd of regularly dressed people beside them. Claude and Lorenz sat behind the couple, one of Claude’s arms casually on the back of Hilda’s seat and the other on Lorenz’s knee as they all chatted. Ashe was up at their head table, getting in some time with them before the panel started.

“I’m so excited for your demonstration, Felix! Annette said you’d be using the files you used for my mask?”

Felix smiled gently at his friend and nodded. He was referring to the mask Felix had printed for him for his Six cosplay, the one he’d be wearing with their Eternal’s group the next day. It had been challenging to design but Felix and Ashe had been over the moon with the result. The four of them had workshopped their outfits as a team the last couple of months, and would be debuting their hard work on Saturday.

“I think we’re just about ready to start!” Annette said into the microphone in her hand. She stood in front of the table Felix and Ingrid were sitting at, smiling out at the people attending their panel. Felix scanned the room one last time after waving to Ashe, his stomach doing backflips when he didn’t see Sylvain. He decided he would do his best not to stress about it. One less person to impress, one less thing to be distracted by when he was supposed to be paying attention to Annette and Ingrid...

Ten minutes into the panel though, while Ingrid and Annette were showing off different props Felix had made, the door to the room could be heard opening. Felix’s eyes widened in anxious glee when he saw Sylvain quietly make his way to the first open seat, waving quickly at him with a large smile on his face. He looked down at his phone when the screen illuminated with a text from him.

_Sorry I’m late!_

Felix smiled like an idiot and forced his eyes back to his laptop. He shoved his butterflies and anxiousness deep down in his stomach, hyper focused on keeping up with his friend’s explanations of what he was supposed to be showing on the projected screen. He’d allow himself glances every now and then out into the crowd, blushing not just from the intense, interested looks from Sylvain, but the small ooo’s and ahh’s from their attendees. It was rare he let himself pat himself on the back for his work, but he couldn’t deny the pride that came from the quiet praise.

When the panel finally came to a close, Felix allowed himself to breathe. He sat back in the chair and shut his computer down, hoping the people who swarmed Annette and Ingrid to talk to them didn’t try to bring him into the conversation. To his relief, only one person made their way past them and the crowd with a smile on their face.

“You did amazing, Felix!”

“Thank you,” Felix replied, sliding his laptop in his backpack. “I never want to do it again. Guys, I’ll meet you outside?” he said to Annette, eyes widened just enough with an almost invisible nod at Sylvain. She nodded happily and waved to them as Felix led them from the panel room.

“You know, I’ve been thinking about using 3D printed materials in some of my landscapes,” Sylvain said with a grin, sitting down beside Felix on a set of couches near the panel room. The hallway outside was quiet for the time being since theirs had been the last one in the room for the night. Felix hadn’t _purposefully_ picked the loveseat, but he’d purposefully picked the loveseat.

“Well, we have one. The three of us went in on it a few years back and it’s already paid for itself. I’d be more than happy to help you use it and show you more about how the files are made.”

“That’d be incredible, Fe, I’d really appreciate that!” The smile on his face made Felix tense up in all the good ways, chest tightening and muscles clenching all around him. All of the anxiety that had built up in his mind and body was quickly evaporating. Sylvain exuded an air of calm that Felix immediately soaked up, wondering in amusement if touching him world make it work even faster somehow. He didn’t doubt it would, but he reminded himself to chill the fuck out.

“What do you guys usually do on Friday night?”

“We drink. Ingrid will find a… heinous adult panel for us to go to.” The tradition went back a few years by that point; they’d gone one year to the hentai panel as a joke. It was an event that they looked forward to now, getting nice and tipsy and then going to watch Bible Black AMVs set to Hosier’s song, _Take Me to Church_. Felix wasn’t sure if Sylvain would think that was too weird though, so he didn’t elaborate.

“Well, hell, count me in! I brought some booze from my place. Don’t even want to know what they’re going to be charging nerds for the special drinks in the hotel bar…”

“You can keep it in our room, if you’d like.”

“Really? I wouldn’t want to impose on you guys…”

“Don’t be silly, it’s more than okay.”

The rest of B✰DC joined them outside of the panel room.

“Everyone is going to change out of costumes and pregame,” Ingrid said happily, her wig already off and being shoved down into her purse. Her shoulders rolled in relief when she ripped her wig cap off and let her shoulder blade length hair fall down.

“Thanks for having me tonight, you guys,” Sylvain said somewhat sheepishly, following Felix’s suit and standing up from the couch. Felix’s friends smiled at him; he desperately wanted to believe there was an unspoken agreement between them that they all loved him already and just wanted them to kiss. Jesus Christ, _that’s_ the kind of shit he couldn’t joke about out loud. Too cringey. Too soon. Get it the fuck together, Sylvain Jose.

“Do you need help bringing in the alcohol from your car?” Felix asked him. Sylvain snorted when in the span of a second Felix had also torn off his wig and was freeing his hair from his wig cap. He gulped though when his long, navy locks fell down to his shoulders, soft and beautiful despite being smushed against his head all day. It was an eerily angelic scene, even with the long, red mark on Felix’s forehead from the cap. Sylvain had only ever seen extremely grainy webcam videos and pictures of Felix when they were kids. He’d always been a tiny, noodley person, his hair stringy and his facial features round in permanent baby face.

Now, though, he still invoked the mental image of someone who would have to quickly dart away so his lunch money wouldn’t get stolen, yet the beauty that was Felix had Sylvain wrapped around his little finger.

“No, I got it! Just let me know your room number and I’ll bring it up!”

They parted at the elevators, waving to each other as Sylvain went through the revolving doors of the hotel to go back to his car. Felix let out a quiet sigh of happiness when the doors slid closed.

“I’m so happy he came to our panel!” Annette said, squeezing herself between Felix and Ingrid for a selfie. Felix shot his face down to his phone screen as she captured it, resulting in a blurry and cryptic photo of him. Their Instagram followers would _not_ perceive him, especially since he’d taken his wig off already. “He got to see how talented you are, Felix.”

“He said he was thinking about using printed materials in his works in the future,” Felix said quietly, grinning to himself at the potential for them to work together again. It was a starkly different than their Harvest Moon fanfiction days, but collaborating with Sylvain had been something Felix had really enjoyed.

In their hotel room, the three of them shred their costumes off their bodies and took a moment to just lie on the beds, naked and cool while they soaked up the room’s powerful air conditioning. Felix was the first to finally stand, but poured them all shots of vodka at the dresser with no pants on. They toasted, Ingrid throwing in a small toast to Felix and Sylvain having sex by the end of the weekend. He nearly choked as he almost spat out the contents of his shot glass.

“ _Shut up_ ,” he groaned, taking the bottle and simply drinking from it. With a knock at the door they all screamed and hurried to put clothes on. “Sorry, Syl, one sec—”

Felix opened the door when he saw both his friends with shirts and pants on. Sylvain had a bottle of his favorite liquor in one hand, a full handle of expensive vanilla vodka. In the other was a smaller bottle of Jaeger, making Felix instantly recoil with a necessary hand pressed over his mouth.

“Leave that out in the hall… please…”

“He had an entire bottle of it last night!”

Felix shot Ingrid an angry look and backed up so Sylvain could come in.

“Oh man, this isn’t even mine. I brought it in case someone might take it off my hands, the people who lived in our unit before us had this hidden in the pantry…”

“Don’t. Let me drink it. I am begging all of you,” Felix said wearily, continuing to drink straight from their bottle of vodka. It burned, but it burned less than his cheeks seeing Sylvain in their hotel room. He caught the end of a small wink from Ingrid when she called for Annette from the bathroom to come talk to her while she took off her boy makeup from the day. Felix could have thrown the liquor at her for that.

“Did you guys have fun around the con today?” Sylvain asked with a smile, taking a seat in the desk chair after setting down the bottles he brought.

“Yeah, we did. People really loved our costumes,” Felix said softly, sitting on the bed closest to the window. He offered the bottle in hand to Sylvain with a smirk on his face, flushing when he took it and also drank straight from it. “Tomorrow’s the big day, though. We’ve worked so hard on those costumes…”

“I cannot fucking wait to see them,” Sylvain said excitedly, handing the bottle back after a few large gulps. His shoulders shivered slightly from the bite of the drink. “Is it just you guys in your group?”

“No, we have some friends joining us as well,” Felix smiled, taking another long drink. “Our friend Ashe is going to be Six, Claude will be Siete.”

“I’m glad to see you never stopped being creative, Fe,” Sylvain found himself saying, sitting comfortably back in the chair while he looked at his friend.

“I mean, this is nowhere _near_ as creative as that Harvest Moon fanfiction.”

The pair snorted, Felix standing up to get them real cups instead of just passing the bottle back and forth. He poured Sylvain and himself a drink, bumping them together with a smirk on his face. Their eyes locked as they downed the vodka. Felix could feel his face becoming scarlet as Sylvain’s eyes went half-lidded while he knocked his cup back.

_Don’t fuck this up. Don’t fuck this up. Go slow. Don’t fuck this up._

**

The hotel bar was crowded. Every table was full of convention attendees, even the tall ones without chairs. The original group that had gone together was now slightly scattered due to the sheer number of people in the space. But Felix and Sylvain, through the sheer power of the universe, were nearly shoved up against each other at the standing table they shared with Annette and Ingrid. Felix’s elbows were held firmly up on the tabletop, trying with all his might not to press his body against Sylvain’s. He could feel their hips touching, and the tight quarters only threatened to push them closer and closer together.

Felix was once again turned towards Sylvain as much as the space would allow. They were discussing Granblue around the table, arguing over their favorites and who was the best. Each member of the Bad Dad Club was _convinced_ that the Eternal they were cosplaying the next day was the ultimate, so they all looked at Sylvain to be the tie breaker. Annette and Ingrid were properly tipsy at this point, so were willing to fight Felix on everything he said.

“I’ve got to go with Quatre,” Sylvain said with a smile, toasting Felix with a wink and his beer as he finished it off. Felix shot a look at his friends and clinked the side of his glass against Sylvain’s bottle.

“The only one here with good taste.”

Behind them, a drunk cosplayer laughed loudly before nearly barreling into Felix. Sylvain’s arm came down around his shoulders to block her while Felix turned to say something in irritation. Wit a scoff he turned back to the table and found himself scooting closer into Sylvain’s arms. They looked at each other quickly, but neither moved. His arm stayed there for at least an hour while they continued talking.

As Felix drank two more cocktails, his hair came loose in the bun he’d thrown it up in and his ass was situated perfectly over Sylvain’s groin while the other man’s arm was around his waist. He was laughing harder and louder than he had in months, winking at Annette and Ingrid when he started reaching for their drinks.

“Fe! We have booze in your room, remember?” Sylvain laughed, gently taking Ingrid’s drink from him and handing it back to her with a smile.

“Thank you, Sylvain! Yes, Felix, go get it from the room. Our tab is already sixty bucks…” she muttered, looking down at the receipt the waitress had printed for them. Felix waved his hand flippantly and pulled out his wallet, handing her his card.

“Are you two staying here? Where should we meet you?” Felix asked, knocking back the rest of his drink and setting the glass on the table.

“We’re going to that panel! It’s in the Habersham room. Just text us when you’re on your way!” Annette said, reaching over to give Felix a quick hug. He nodded and looked up at Sylvain.

“Let’s go,” he said, unable to blink as he looked up into Sylvain’s warm, honey-colored eyes. His face looked so soft and calm even in the chaos of the bar, his shoulders relaxed as he leaned on their tall table. He seemed to light up even more when Felix spoke to him.

“Yeah, let’s go,” he replied, waving to Annette and Ingrid before leading them out of the crowd. His arm stayed on Felix’s waist the entire walk to the elevators, only leaving it when they crossed the threshold of the hotel room. The pair stopped just inside, silent as they looked at each other. Neither man breathed, both sets of eyes as wide as the moon. “Felix…”

“Sylvain.”

Felix blinked quickly, barely feeling the sensation of his feet inching ever closer to the other. His fingers first clenched Sylvain’s shirt, gripping it tightly while short, shallow breaths pushed out of his mouth. He took a step forward, moving one of his hands up to the other’s neck. Sylvain smiled softly at him and gently put his hand over Felix’s.

“Can I kiss you?” he asked him, maintaining their current distance with a grin. Felix scoffed and rolled his eyes but nodded, nearly gasping when Sylvain hungrily took his face in his hands and kissed him. The shorter man eagerly pushed him back against the bathroom door, standing on his toes and panting softly into the kiss. His fingers curled up in Sylvain’s hair and grabbed, feeling as though he couldn’t get close enough.

“I’ve wanted to do this,” Felix whispered, nearly climbing up Sylvain’s torso and straddling him, “since this morning…”

“I’m glad the feeling was mutual,” Sylvain breathed into his ear, letting loose his hair and gently wrapping it around his hand. His lips moved down to Felix’s neck and ravaged it, biting gently in between sucks and licks. When Felix moaned against him, he stopped and held his chin while he looked down into his eyes. “I tried to convince myself this… crush I had on you was baseless. That I was silly for having it.”

Felix nodded, leaning into his head and closing his eyes. “Me too. But the moment I knew who you were I—” Felix huffed and gently pressed his tongue into Sylvain’s mouth, deepening the kiss and wrapping him up in his arms.

“Do you still want to go to that panel?”

“No.”

Felix hastily pulled out his phone while Sylvain attached himself to his neck, shutting his eyes tightly in pleasure before he could even begin typing.

_Not going to panel. Busy._

_use protection, fraldarius._

Felix threw his phone on the dresser and took Sylvain’s hand, leading him over to his bed. He pulled him down on top of him and trembled, the soft expression on his face making his stomach leap in his abdomen.

“Can. Can we just kiss, first?” Jesus, he felt like a high schooler. He could feel the scarlet on his face and the frown on his lips, Sylvain’s resulting chuckle only making them worse. It had been a while since he’d been intimate with anyone, but normally he wouldn’t be in such a state. Going to bed with strangers was routine, now; he told them what he wanted, what he’d do in return, and there were no feelings or emotions involved. But, Sylvain…

“I’m in no rush,” Sylvain said lowly, tracing his fingers down Felix’s ear piercings and laying a gentle kiss on his lips. “This isn’t bad, you know.”

Felix squirmed under him and whimpered as he pressed his groin up against the other, letting him know with an indirect look just how much he wanted to go further. But he gripped the collar of Sylvain’s shirt and nodded, pulling him down so he would lie on his chest.

“I’ve dreamt of this before,” he started, finally focusing his eyes on his friend. “Years after I… stopped talking to you.” He ran his thumb over Sylvain’s cheek, feeling breathless just at the sight of his eyes gazing up into him alone. His red brows were furrowed, the smallest pout on his lips as he listened to him. “It doesn’t make sense for me to feel the way I feel.”

“It doesn’t have to,” Sylvain said with a soft wink. “Look at me. Just hearing your name yesterday has had me in a constant state of… _panic_. Remembering all that we used to do together, missing you when you stopped coming online—” Felix made a strained noise and shut his eyes, cheeks flushing with emotion. “No—Fe, oh man, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that.” Sylvain hugged around Felix’s shoulders and kissed his chest, biting his lip in worry. “Look. I’ve got you back now. Bernie wants to be friends again, too… we’re not letting you go again,” he said quietly, barely loud enough for Felix to hear him. Felix’s heart pounded loudly in his chest as they curled up together on the bed, feeling home at last in Sylvain’s gaze and embrace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on twitter! @setethstiddies

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on twitter, @setethstiddies!


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